Leisure Divorce Letters Exchanged

[Gyani Jarnail Singh]

Dear wife,[/FONT]​

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I’m writing you this letter to tell you that [/FONT]
I’m leaving you for good. [/FONT]
I’ve been a good man to you for seven years[/FONT][/FONT]​

and I have nothing to show for it. [/FONT]
These last two weeks have been hell. [/FONT]
Your boss called to tell me that [/FONT]
you had quit your job today and [/FONT]
that was the last straw.[/FONT][/FONT] [/FONT]​

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[/FONT]

Last week, you came home and didn’t [/FONT]
even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, [/FONT]
cooked your favourite meal, [/FONT]
and even wore a brand new pair of silk shorts [/FONT]
later that night. [/FONT][/FONT]​

You came home, nibbled at your food [/FONT]
for two minutes, and went straight to sleep [/FONT]
after watching all of your soaps. [/FONT]
You don’t tell me you love me anymore, [/FONT]
you don’t want sex anymore or anything. [/FONT]
Either you’re cheating on me [/FONT]
or you don’t love me. [/FONT]
Whichever is the case….I’m gone.[/FONT][/FONT]​

[/FONT]Signed,[/FONT]​

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Your EX-Husband[/FONT]​

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P.S. Don’t try to find me. [/FONT]​

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Your sister and I are moving away [/FONT]​

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to a different town together. Have a great life![/FONT]​

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​

Dear Ex-Husband,[/FONT] [/FONT]​

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[/FONT]Nothing has made my day more enjoyable [/FONT]
than receiving your letter. [/FONT]
It’s true that you and I have been married [/FONT]
for seven years, although a ‘good man’ [/FONT]
is a far cry from what you’ve been. [/FONT]
I watch my soaps so much because [/FONT]
they drown out your constant [/FONT]
whining and griping. [/FONT]
It’s just too bad it doesn’t work.[/FONT][/FONT] [/FONT]​

[/FONT]​

[/FONT]​

Yes, I did notice when you got a hair cut [/FONT]
last week…..and actually the first thing [/FONT]
that came to my mind was [/FONT]
“You look just like a girl”[/FONT]
but my mother raised me not to say anything [/FONT]
at all if you can’t say anything nice. [/FONT]
And when you cooked my favourite meal, [/FONT]
you must have gotten me confused with my [/FONT]
SISTER, because I stopped eating pork [/FONT]
seven years ago.[/FONT][/FONT] [/FONT]​

[/FONT]​

[/FONT]​

I turned away from you when you had [/FONT]
those new silk shorts on because [/FONT]
the price tag was still on them. [/FONT]
I prayed that it was just a coincidence [/FONT]
that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars [/FONT]
from me that morning and your silk [/FONT]
shorts were $49.99…[/FONT][/FONT] [/FONT]​

[/FONT]​

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After all of this, I still loved you and felt that [/FONT]
we could work it out. [/FONT]
So when I discovered that I had hit the [/FONT]
lottery for twenty million dollars, [/FONT]
I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Hawaii. [/FONT]
But when I got home you were gone. [/FONT]
Everything happens for a reason I guess. [/FONT]
I hope you have the fulfilling life [/FONT]
you’ve always wanted.[/FONT][/FONT] [/FONT]​

[/FONT]​

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[/FONT]My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, [/FONT]
you won’t get a cent from me. [/FONT]
So take care.[/FONT]
Signed: Rich As Hell and Freeeeeeeeeeee![/FONT][/FONT] [/FONT]​

[/FONT]

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P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this [/FONT]
but [/FONT]
my sister ‘Carla’…was born Carl. [/FONT]
I hope that’s not a problem for you.[/FONT][/FONT]​

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[/FONT]​

MY wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.’ I bought her a scale.
And then the fight started.

 

[Archived_member7]

HEHEHEHEHEHHHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE.....WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AMAZINGLY FUNNNY.

THANKS jARNAIL JI