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Life Experience

Anoop

SPNer
Mar 12, 2006
153
14
London Uk
From my life experience at present, teenage life is so hard.

And yet i am still finding it hard. I have been very depressed, and from the start i have not had any confidence from myself. I find that my life will be hard in the future, and i feel guilty but yet i dont admit it and i keep it locked inside that i hate everything. Ive been in love, and it sure hurts.

At the moment this girl, who i have held hands with once, lol, we were in love, but i couldnt start a good convo, and i would probably be shy. And yet, i feel as though it is all over, that i wont be able to make her mine, and iv ebeen struggling for 2 years. My studies have not been good. And i dont like the company of my family. I feel as though im lost in life. I dont usually hang around with many people.

I belive in god, but i dont admit to things.

I dont know what to do, would god help me somehow? I dont know whether to turn my back on my present life, and find a new path, or to keep trying which would waste my time.

I am a confused person in life, and i want to go into the path of god. Its so hard.
 

sachit

SPNer
Oct 12, 2005
3
0
what i can suggest as a solution to your problem is , start a new life without ending this one , firstly be confident of yourself , if you dont belive in urself then who will , secondly start reading good books - self help , go on for a large scale reinvention , start concentrating on studies ( do something what you easily can and you'll eventually be able to do what you cant ) , get a pet if you can , and slowly (mind it ! slowly , you cant do it in a few days ) you'll discover that things are changing and life wont trouble you any more , goodbye and best of luck , sachit arora spn member
 
May 6, 2006
27
2
Chandigarh
Always Remember Three Things in Life and you will be always in a win-win situation:
1) God Exists, HE is Omnipresent
2) God is with me
3) and GOD LOVES ME
There is no one greater than GOD and If HE loves you no one can defeat you and whole world is yours..... Think it in this way, you are in love with this girl, can you see her sad and dejected... i bet that you can't... so how can GOD see you defeated and dejected if HE loves you... it is just that you have to feel HIS love.
You are having parents, you are having health, you are having good looks (i am quiet sure of this)..... see what all Gifts GOD has given to you...... Feel HIS presence and then see HIS powers and ....... let the Magic Begin !!!
 
Mar 4, 2006
13
8
Oklahoma, USA
Dearest Anoop:
It has been a few years since I have been a teen; but I do remember having many of the same feelings as you do. I am a school teacher, and my students are teens, and I hear in them many of the things that you voice in your letter. My dear, you are NOT alone. That is one thing to remember...especially when you feel that you are alone. Almost all young people are going through the things that you are. Sachit gives you some great advice...get outside of yourself and you will begin to find yourself, your true self. It is normal to have the feelings that you have, and if you begin to cultivate interests and activities outside of yourself you will begin to be able to cope with these feelings. Reach out to others (who have good habits). Reach out to God! Know that we are here as well and those of us who are adults have survived those teen years!
Love and good luck!!!
Parvatasundari
 
Jan 6, 2005
3,450
3,762
Metro-Vancouver, B.C., Canada
Anoop Ji:

Just remember in Sikhism the most SELF-EMPOWERMENT path is = SEVA + SIMRAM + SANGAT !

***************************************************


Twelve Valuable Steps to Raise Your Self Esteem



As adults, we can choose the messages we accept or reject. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your permission."
Building high self-esteem is a process, not something you can develop overnight," says Jeffrey Keller. "Yet, I believe every person has the capacity of high self-esteem. The question is, are you ready to make a commitment to increase your self-esteem?"

If your answer is yes, here are 12 steps to get you started:


Step One
Stop comparing yourself with other people. There will always be some people who have more than you and some who have less. If you play the comparison game, you'll run into too many "opponents" you can't defeat.


Step Two
Stop putting yourself down. You can't develop high self-esteem if you repeat negative phrases about yourself and your abilities. Whether speaking about your appearances, your career, your relationships, your financial situation, or any other aspects of your life, avoid self-deprecating comments.

Step Three
Accept all compliments with "thank you." Ever received a compliment and replied," Oh, it was nothing." When you reject a compliment, the message you give yourself is that you are not worthy of praise. Respond to all compliments with a simple Thank You."

Step Four
Use affirmations to enhance your self-esteem. On the back of a business card or small index card, write out a statement such as "I like and accept my self." or "I am valuable, lovable person and deserve the best in life." Carry the card with you. Repeat the statement several times during the day, especially at night before going to bed and after getting up in the morning. Whenever you say the affirmation, allow yourself to experience positive feelings about your statement.

Step Five
Take advantage of workshops, books and cassette tape programs on self-esteem. Whatever material you allow to dominate mind will eventually take root and affect your behavior. If you watch negative television programs or read newspaper reports of murders and business rip off; you will grow cynical and pessimistic. Similarly, if you read books or listen to programs, that are positive in nature, you will take on these characteristics.

Step Six
Associate with positive, supportive people. When you are surrounded by negative people who constantly put you and your ideas down, your self-esteem is lowered. On the other hand, when you are accepted and encouraged, you feel better about yourself in the best possible environment to raise your self-esteem.

Step Seven
Make a list of your past successes. This doesn't necessarily have to consist of monumental accomplishments. It can include your "minor victories," like learning to skate, graduating from high school, receiving an award or promotion, reaching a business goal, etc. Read this list often. While reviewing it, close your eyes and recreate the feelings of satisfaction and joy you experienced when you first attained each success.

Step Eight
Make a list of your positive qualities. Are you honest? Unselfish? Helpful? Creative? Be generous with yourself and write down at least 20 positive qualities. Again, it's important to review this list often. Most people dwell on their inadequacies and then wonder why their life isn't working out. Start focusing on your positive traits and you'll stand a much better chance of achieving what you wish to achieve.

Step Nine
Start giving more. I'm not talking about money. Rather, I mean that you must begin to give more of yourself to those around your. When you do things for others, you are making a positive contribution and you begin to feel more valuable, which, in turn, lifts your spirits and raises your own self-esteem.


Step Ten
Get involved in work and activities you love. It's hard to feel good about yourself if your days are spent in work you despise. Self-esteem flourishes when you are engaged in work and activities that you enjoy and make you feel valuable. Even if you can't explore alternative career options at the present time, you can still devote leisure time to hobbies and activities, which you find stimulating and enjoyable.

Step Eleven
Be true to yourself. Live your own life - not the life others have decided is best for you. You'll never gain your own respect and feel good about yourself if you aren't leading the life you want to lead. If you're making decisions based on getting approval from friends and relatives, you aren't being true to yourself and your self-esteem is lowered.

Step Twelve
Take action! You won't develop high self-esteem if you sit on the sidelines and back away from challenges. When you take action - regardless of the ensuing result - you feel better about yourself. When you fail to move forward because of fear and anxiety, you'll be frustrated and unhappy - and you will undoubtedly deal a damaging blow to your self-esteem.

The "real you" is a magnificent, unique being with enormous potential and capacity for experiencing love of yourself and extending love to others. As your self-esteem grows, this "real you" emerges. You begin to take more risks and not be afraid of failure; you aren't as concerned with getting approval of others; your relationships are much more rewarding; you pursue activities that bring you joy and satisfaction; and you will make a positive contribution to the world. Most importantly, high self esteem brings you peace of mind ... when you're alone, you truly appreciate the person you're with - yourself.

source: http://hypnotherapy.net/12se.shtml

***********************************************
Anoop Ji:

Just remember in Sikhism the most SELF-EMPOWERMENT path is = SEVA + SIMRAM + SANGAT !















 

Anoop

SPNer
Mar 12, 2006
153
14
London Uk
From all of you, thankyou so much, thanks for the supprot and replies, and i mean all of you. I get courage when i hear about god. And even thoguh the world isnt going in the divine spirit, i still belive god supports us, as he is everything,...all of you thankyou and god bless everyone in the world :}{}{}: :)
 
Dec 27, 2004
183
8
78
Hertfordshire England
Anoop said:
From my life experience at present, teenage life is so hard.

And yet i am still finding it hard. I have been very depressed, and from the start i have not had any confidence from myself. I find that my life will be hard in the future, and i feel guilty but yet i dont admit it and i keep it locked inside that i hate everything. Ive been in love, and it sure hurts.

At the moment this girl, who i have held hands with once, lol, we were in love, but i couldnt start a good convo, and i would probably be shy. And yet, i feel as though it is all over, that i wont be able to make her mine, and iv ebeen struggling for 2 years. My studies have not been good. And i dont like the company of my family. I feel as though im lost in life. I dont usually hang around with many people.

I belive in god, but i dont admit to things.

I dont know what to do, would god help me somehow? I dont know whether to turn my back on my present life, and find a new path, or to keep trying which would waste my time.

I am a confused person in life, and i want to go into the path of god. Its so hard.


Dear Anoop, welcome to life. All the things you are feeling are just a part of being human. These are common emotions that are shared by all of us, they transcend race and cultures and are at the very heart of what makes us human.

Also as we get older our experiences and the way we cope with them mould us into the people we are. Our troubles, fears, joys and life’s path builds in us either a disgruntled negative human anchor that drags our fellow man down, or a strong caring individual that can reach out and help.

You may find this hard to believe but even an old man like me once thought that this one girl was the only one that she alone was in this time I lived and was my one true love!
Man that really hurt when she didn’t feel that same way!!!!!!

It is something that most of us feel, boys and girls, men and women, don’t be disheartened although it is painful and difficult try not to become melancholy.

As to wondering about the future and what path to take? Whatever decision you make, remember that life is just one shot, we don’t get another go and time and unforeseen occurrence can befall anyone. Think and weigh up the pros and cons, then life takes over and what will be will be.

As to your belief in God, well there are many religions, and people will try to sway you into this belief or that belief.
With Sikhism you have a wonderful foundation that views God with great respect and their fellow man as a worthy part of creation no matter what race or belief the individual possess.

Good luck and best wishes for the future. You are on a wonderful journey enjoy.:)

John
 

garrettv

SPNer
Mar 24, 2006
2
0
New Mexico
Good Morning,

I can sure relate to your present situation, as I have been there. It's very important that you surround yourself with loving and caring people who have your best interest at heart. Your e-mail is a very good first step at finding the path of your journey. Remember, the higher power has already set your path. It's important that you try to keep your human ego from trying to change that path. I've started meditating and yoga and can tell you from personal experience that this will help you settle your mind, body, and soul. Look for the positive things in everyday seconds, minutes, hours. The sunrise, sunset, a bird in the sky, the love of yourself. Please feel free to e-mail me if you would like to further the conversation. God Bless and remember that you are loved.

Sat Nam




Anoop said:
From my life experience at present, teenage life is so hard.

And yet i am still finding it hard. I have been very depressed, and from the start i have not had any confidence from myself. I find that my life will be hard in the future, and i feel guilty but yet i dont admit it and i keep it locked inside that i hate everything. Ive been in love, and it sure hurts.

At the moment this girl, who i have held hands with once, lol, we were in love, but i couldnt start a good convo, and i would probably be shy. And yet, i feel as though it is all over, that i wont be able to make her mine, and iv ebeen struggling for 2 years. My studies have not been good. And i dont like the company of my family. I feel as though im lost in life. I dont usually hang around with many people.

I belive in god, but i dont admit to things.

I dont know what to do, would god help me somehow? I dont know whether to turn my back on my present life, and find a new path, or to keep trying which would waste my time.

I am a confused person in life, and i want to go into the path of god. Its so hard.
 
Apr 5, 2006
10
2
Hey Anoop i can understand u very well coz i have been to this suitation once and now i m out ... u know how???... just with grace of Sri Gurunanak Dev ji... look I won't talk abt u but i wil take example lets take mine... I was having gf for 3 yrs when i was doing graduation.. it was only one thing in my mind : just her.... I was noty studying at all.. i don't care for my frnds , my family ... i was unaware of my families responsilbilties??... One day she broke up with me for some reason ... and Boy!!! my life completely changed.. i came to know so many things that time about my family problems.. i was amazed to know all that things and i realised when i was with that gal " i was not able to concentrate on my studies, responsilbilties about my family" and now its completely diff...

When i left her ... i got All India MCA Rank 42 which i would not able to get if she was there... i started sloving family problems and spending time with my frnds who were always there to help me when i was with that gal and ignore them...

I m not saying u shouldn't have gf but if u want 2 have then she should have LIMITS.. a relationship develops with space and time that's wat u call LIMIT...

now I go to gurudwara Amrit wale do sewa listen kirtan... whole day i love to listen shabads... its just Sri Gurunanak Dev ji 's Grace that i m like this now...

I m in love with Sri Gurunanak... i don't like anything else but just Sewa and listen Shabad..

Many people is my class say u r mad but i say " if to b in love with Gurunanak Dev ji is b mad , please call me MAD"

This world won't give u anything In todays World many people r Dukhi beacuse there near one's r Sukhi...Koi kise na sukh nahi Dekh sakda... every1 is after money.. but Sri Gurunanak Dev ji Says " Pappa baj na eikathi hoye moya sath na jae"... piase naal nahi jana


To have confidence just think

1.what is happening its for Good whether its bad thing... Sri Gurunanak Dev ji is doing good for all for his Children...

2.Just think This thing for 1 week and feel the change

3. Don't need worldly things u r born here for 2 things : Simran and Sewa

just go to gurudwara at amrit wale and do path, kirtan sunao and feel the change..

You wil feel urself above the World....

In the Last

Sri Gurunanak Dev Ji says " Nanak Chinta Mat kare , Chinta tis ki ae"

Don't take tension or worries its not ur duty .... God will have tension or worry u just do ur duty : Simran and Sewa
 
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