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The Absolute Truth About Man's First Moon Landing
THE BATHINDA TIMES
Forty years ago today, the first men - Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin - landed on the moon.
A small step for man, a giant step for mankind?
Well, you be the judge.
The following story, almost certainly told by Neil Armstrong himself, but suppressed since then - by who else? the CIA! - has nevertheless been leaked to the media by an Indian chap then on the staff of NASA:
Neil Armstrong had barely stepped down on the moon and had taken but a few steps when he spots a Sardar standing a few meters away, quietly gawking at all the goings-on.
"Jee Aayaan noon," shouts the Sardar: "Welcome!"
Neil is totally flabbergasted and at a total loss for words.
When he recovers, he blurts out: "When did you get here?"
The Sardar laughs, the tone implying, "Isn't it obvious?"
"Oh-hh-h-h-h! Assi taan pertishun to baad, tabbar laikey sidha ithe hee aa gaye saan!" - "Oh, we came here straight, my family and I, right after the Partition!"
This was frantically related by Neil back to Mission Control forthwith.
Curious to find who could have beat them on the race to the moon and to fathom the intelligence of this man, they instructed Neil to ask him some questions to test his IQ.
Not to give the Sardar much time to think, Neil spat out the questions, one after the other, barely giving the fellow time to reply.
Neil Armstrong - Q: How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
Sardar: Concrete floors are very hard to crack.
Q: If it took eight men 10 hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
A: No time at all. It is already built.
Q: If you have three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A: Very large hands .
Q: How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A: It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.
Q: How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A: No problem. He sleeps at night.
Q: What can you never eat for breakfast?
A: Dinner
Q: The "Bay of Bengal" is in which state?
A: Liquid.
This exchange was, of course, carried live on the radio back to Mission Control.
The astronauts, we are told, were ordered to immediately head back to earth. We know that they did, with unseemly haste.
But for some inexplicable reason, the whole incident has been kept under wraps since then.
Maybe, now Obama is President and it's the 40th anniversary of the momentous meeting on the moon, the Americans will finally acknowledge the truth to the world!
If not, maybe Manmohan Singh will raise the issue ... but don't hold your breath!
[We acknowledge critical input on this story from Mr. Vipin Buckshey, Delhi, and The Tribune.]
July 20, 2009
THE BATHINDA TIMES
Forty years ago today, the first men - Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin - landed on the moon.
A small step for man, a giant step for mankind?
Well, you be the judge.
The following story, almost certainly told by Neil Armstrong himself, but suppressed since then - by who else? the CIA! - has nevertheless been leaked to the media by an Indian chap then on the staff of NASA:
Neil Armstrong had barely stepped down on the moon and had taken but a few steps when he spots a Sardar standing a few meters away, quietly gawking at all the goings-on.
"Jee Aayaan noon," shouts the Sardar: "Welcome!"
Neil is totally flabbergasted and at a total loss for words.
When he recovers, he blurts out: "When did you get here?"
The Sardar laughs, the tone implying, "Isn't it obvious?"
"Oh-hh-h-h-h! Assi taan pertishun to baad, tabbar laikey sidha ithe hee aa gaye saan!" - "Oh, we came here straight, my family and I, right after the Partition!"
This was frantically related by Neil back to Mission Control forthwith.
Curious to find who could have beat them on the race to the moon and to fathom the intelligence of this man, they instructed Neil to ask him some questions to test his IQ.
Not to give the Sardar much time to think, Neil spat out the questions, one after the other, barely giving the fellow time to reply.
Neil Armstrong - Q: How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
Sardar: Concrete floors are very hard to crack.
Q: If it took eight men 10 hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
A: No time at all. It is already built.
Q: If you have three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A: Very large hands .
Q: How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A: It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.
Q: How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A: No problem. He sleeps at night.
Q: What can you never eat for breakfast?
A: Dinner
Q: The "Bay of Bengal" is in which state?
A: Liquid.
This exchange was, of course, carried live on the radio back to Mission Control.
The astronauts, we are told, were ordered to immediately head back to earth. We know that they did, with unseemly haste.
But for some inexplicable reason, the whole incident has been kept under wraps since then.
Maybe, now Obama is President and it's the 40th anniversary of the momentous meeting on the moon, the Americans will finally acknowledge the truth to the world!
If not, maybe Manmohan Singh will raise the issue ... but don't hold your breath!
[We acknowledge critical input on this story from Mr. Vipin Buckshey, Delhi, and The Tribune.]
July 20, 2009
