Hard Talk Waxing Vs Trimming

Amitojsinghh · Mar 9, 2018

I am now 18 years old live in delhi and am a curious person who likes to contradict even the most basic principles that we as a sikhs have been taught. So I have this lingering question since I started to see relatives around me judging people to cut their hair.

The question that I have is that if god almighty has formed us and made us appear how we are and that we should keep our appearance as god has made us then we shouldn’t disobey it and follow it to the fullest. While growing up I always saw my mainly female relatives getting waxed or threading their eyebrows which is totally cool but then the same females judge a guy who trims their beard. If you are such a great follower of sikhism and rules of sikhism that you don’t even want to converse with a guy trimming their hair then why do they go ahead and contradict themselves?

Secondly, they argue and I mean really argue and scream that they don’t put a blade to their hair but the principle that we are following is not to alter appearance then that is however contradicted.

But when I spoke to my mother about it she said that most people do it and they don’t feel that it is wrong for women to get their hair waxed so that is why she gets it done as it is accepted by the society. But when I said that this show the double standards that all people have she that it my choice and my opinion that I don’t like guys who shave or trim and it showed their upbringing and reflected their nature somehow. And it is okay for women to do it.

That is when I was even more puzzled, these days as we become more and more forward thinkers how can someone judge a person on the basis of their choice of appearance they want to have? If {censored}-shaming or fat-shaming someone is morally wrong then isn’t this the same and isn’t this exactly what our gurus refrained us from doing? Judging.

Waiting for you response.

Harry Haller · Mar 10, 2018

its not about hair, funnily enough, not to my mind anyway, its about society.

On the whole, from my own experiences, Sikh men like their women to look feminine, which is why most Sikh men would run a mile from a dastar wearing woman, ( I said most, not all Harkiran), they do not want women to be hairy turban wearing experts of Sikhism, or else they would lose their monopoly on authority. So women are encouraged to be feminine, and men are encouraged to be hairy. Also if a woman does not wax, then she is seen as a threat by other women, and indeed other men, as they be then perceived as more holy, which just won't do. Waxing is actually societies way of repressing women, they would not understand theology, so why bother going to all the trouble of keeping hair, but men?? ah men are different, men are leaders and fathers and husbands, men have to have hair, its a domination facet, man hairy, authoritive in charge, in control, woman, waxed, submissive, now go and make my dinner and feed my parents, and you better listen, as I have more hair than you, its a power thing.

Amitojsinghh · Mar 10, 2018

I don’t really think that this is a problem with the mens I really think its the women here who have dominated here they have normalised this as if its not against our beliefs and men just simply accept it or they don’t refute it because they might not say it or accept it but what you said about turbaned women is so true and again no offense to anyone please.
I would love to get womens perspective on this topic though.

Harry Haller · Mar 10, 2018

ok and who made the women normalise it, well, the men!

as I am not a woman, although I have my dreams, I will bow out for the moment

Amitojsinghh · Mar 10, 2018

I am not saying that it is not normal anyone can do anything but men are judged when they voice or act on their choice but women have it easier in this respect.

Harry Haller · Mar 10, 2018

Amitojsinghh said:
I am not saying that it is not normal anyone can do anything but men are judged when they voice or act on their choice but women have it easier in this respect.

I have no idea what you are talking about, but, I think he means he wants the female point of view,

Harkiran Kaur · Mar 10, 2018

Erm I’m probably not the best one to comment on this LOL my attitude is to heck with what men think, I’m following my Guru. So I’ll tie my dastar, and leave my eyebrows alone thank you.

P.s. I think women caked in makeup with fake hairstyles held together by layers of hairspray, fake nails that look like claws glued and painted, can never compare to natural beauty, the way Waheguru made us. I did the whole makeup hairstyle etc thing when younger and before I followed Sikhi and so done with being fake now.

Tejwant Singh · Mar 10, 2018

Harkiran Kaur said:
Erm I’m probably not the best one to comment on this LOL my attitude is to heck with what men think, I’m following my Guru. So I’ll tie my dastar, and leave my eyebrows alone thank you.

P.s. I think women caked in makeup with fake hairstyles held together by layers of hairspray, fake nails that look like claws glued and painted, can never compare to natural beauty, the way Waheguru made us. I did the whole makeup hairstyle etc thing when younger and before I followed Sikhi and so done with being fake now.

I agree, Harkiran ji.

Vanity IS insecurity!

namritanevaeh · Mar 11, 2018

I have long wondered...

What is the difference between having hair coming out (at the root) when you're *brushing* it, as some DOES invariably pull out, and waxing or threading.

I mean obviously yes there's a more conscious "pattern" sought by threading for example. But at the end of the day, the hair is yanked out at the root...and it is too if you brush and it comes out.

Also: is it allowed to *burn* your hair?

Do Sikhs not find that as their hair grows longer, and is full of tangles due to more split ends, that brushing it pulls more, and therefore more hairs are pulled out at the roots? I find I have this problem. And it makes me wonder if it isn't a fair trade-off to burn away split ends so I actually remove fewer hairs by them being pulled in tangles!

Harry Haller · Mar 11, 2018

My own opinion is that if your agenda is pure, then it really does not make any difference at all, you can pretty much do what you want, as it is, it is only the viewable that people stress over, no one worries about their thoughts, or their actions that no one sees, why would it not be allowed to burn your hair?

Tejwant Singh · Mar 11, 2018

One wonders if Rom ਰੋਮ were not incorrectly translated as hair by the Christian missionaries, the earlier English translators of the SGGS, then in which way we would be talking about this subject!

Rom ਰੋਮ in the SGGS means a pore and even a cell but not hair.

namritanevaeh · Mar 12, 2018

Tejwant Singh said:
One wonders if Rom ਰੋਮ were not incorrectly translated as hair by the Christian missionaries, the earlier English translators of the SGGS, then in which way we would be talking about this subject!

Rom ਰੋਮ in the SGGS means a pore and even a cell but not hair.

Can you explain this context?

My apologies but I don't know where Rom is used and because of this, don't know how that would make a difference.

I have read bits and pieces of the SGGS, but I am really a "newborn" when it comes to how much I've managed to read so far (having only really delved into this in the past few years).

Tejwant Singh · Mar 12, 2018

namritanevaeh said:
Can you explain this context?

My apologies but I don't know where Rom is used and because of this, don't know how that would make a difference.

I have read bits and pieces of the SGGS, but I am really a "newborn" when it comes to how much I've managed to read so far (having only really delved into this in the past few years).

SikhiToTheMax