General Controlling Kaam (Lust)

[Dalvinder Singh Grewal]

I need Sangat's help on how to control one of the vices that seem to bother me everday. Kaam is something that is a common problem today. In this part of the world men get sidetracked by lustful objects everyday and everywhere. People say its a disease in a man's body. But of course that disease can be removed. I must get advice on how to control Kaam. I've heard back than Sant Baba Nand Singh would never be in a room with only a woman alone unless the woman was with another man. Now I can't do that sadly enough. But He even mentioned back then how Kalyug will keep getting worse and worse and that this vice will get harder to stay away from. Doing Paath helps a lot, but still doesn't help me fully combat Kaam. So advice would be appreciated by all. What steps should I take everyday to help me get better?

Nothing difficult. Be with sangat morning and evening rather than those who lead you to kaam. Study Gurbani. Detach your mind from kaam and attach to naam. Be naturally calm and keep your dhyan from opposite sex to the one made that; the God.

 

[Harry Haller]

Nothing difficult. Be with sangat morning and evening rather than those who lead you to kaam. Study Gurbani. Detach your mind from kaam and attach to naam. Be naturally calm and keep your dhyan from opposite sex to the one made that; the God.

you mean hide from women?

 

[Dalvinder Singh Grewal]

you mean hide from women?

'kaam' is pointing towards is having relationship other than marital relationship and has been well clarified in SGGS and does not need further clarification.

 

[Harry Haller]

'kaam' is pointing towards is having relationship other than marital relationship and has been well clarified in SGGS and does not need further clarification.

Kaam I understand, but you seem to be advocating the 'not allowing oneself to be put in a situation where kaam develops' rather than any understanding of kaam, or the effect it has on oneself

 

[Harkiran Kaur]

Nothing difficult. Be with sangat morning and evening rather than those who lead you to kaam. Study Gurbani. Detach your mind from kaam and attach to naam. Be naturally calm and keep your dhyan from opposite sex to the one made that; the God.

What about kaam with alcohol or gambling or drugs or cigarettes? Etc? Kaam does not mean sex or lust... Kaam means desire which is not controlled. Sex is only one example. It's a misnomer to think kaam only means sex.

 

[Tejwant Singh]

'kaam' is pointing towards is having relationship other than marital relationship and has been well clarified in SGGS and does not need further clarification.

How about if one is having relationship other than marital relationship in one's mind?

Is that Kaam?

As the old saying goes,"Virginity is not between one's legs but between one's ears".

 

[Rajwinder]

I think credit probably goes to the way our brain works .. it learns , imagine and believe in things when it sees some thing or listen to some thing or feel something .. so in your life if u meet people with certain kind of thinking or if u watch certain kind of things on screens or if u listen certain kind of things more then your brain will start acting the same way .. when we talk about lust then the things that come to your mind when u watch a person or u r in some situation are actually result of your imagination that your brain came up with due to something that u either watched or experienced before. So basically you need to change your brain inputs to get the control back. Now it is easy said then done .. one thing that worked for me is this .. spend some time on analyzing what all passion you have and of course it should include lust too ;-) .. then pick one of the other passion and start training your brain in that passion , like books u read , what u watch , your personal circle .. change every thing according to pamper this new passion. During this time lust is not going to come down and frankly dont even bother about it like dont try to fight it. just keep in mind in this case stay protected from std's. once your brain start getting so many inputs for this new passion .. believe me this passion is going to kill other passions including lust .. i dont say that you will be totally lust free but it will be second class citizen , Other passions take so much time that you will not be left with any time to think about lust ;-)