Re: Is it okay to marry a non-sikh ?
I think there is a cultural difference that is worth pointing out.
In the west, identity is frequently associated with things like ethnicity and nationality. It's common to hear friends say to one another statements like "I'm black, but my wife is Puerto Rican" or "We're proud to be Irish". Personal ads start with abreviations such as SWF (Single White Female) or DBM (Divorced Black Male).
Religion is generally used to indicate devotion. Someone that says they are a "Christian" says so because they are a practicing Christian.
But in the east, religion basically assumes the role of ethnicity. People identify themselves as Sikhs as a way of stating their background...and not necessarily as a way of devotion. I see many desi Sikhs in the US genericaly refer to their American neighbors as "Christians" for the same reason...even though the people may...or may not...be practicing Christians.
I have absolutely no opposition with marriage of people that have ethnic, cultural, or national differences...but I think it is extremely important that the couple has similar values. Sometimes religion is the source of the values that one has (even if one doesn't practice the faith). Sometimes it is not.
Where I hesitate a little bit is because...people change as they get married and start raising a family. Values often have new meaning once a couple actually has a child in their arms and they start planning how they are going to teach what to their child. Some parents realize that they don't want to raise their children with no guidance their religion. Others get inspired at the chance to teach a child their religion in their own way.
If the parents cannot agree on a particular course...that leads to tension in the marriage, confusion for the child...and sometimes...worse. This problem is not restricted to interfaith marriages. Such a problem could even occur among Sikhs of different levels of orthodoxy, such as a marriage between a mona/i and a Keshdhari.
If the parents can agree on a particular course, and can do so without confusing the child...then I see no problem.
I think there is a cultural difference that is worth pointing out.
In the west, identity is frequently associated with things like ethnicity and nationality. It's common to hear friends say to one another statements like "I'm black, but my wife is Puerto Rican" or "We're proud to be Irish". Personal ads start with abreviations such as SWF (Single White Female) or DBM (Divorced Black Male).
Religion is generally used to indicate devotion. Someone that says they are a "Christian" says so because they are a practicing Christian.
But in the east, religion basically assumes the role of ethnicity. People identify themselves as Sikhs as a way of stating their background...and not necessarily as a way of devotion. I see many desi Sikhs in the US genericaly refer to their American neighbors as "Christians" for the same reason...even though the people may...or may not...be practicing Christians.
I have absolutely no opposition with marriage of people that have ethnic, cultural, or national differences...but I think it is extremely important that the couple has similar values. Sometimes religion is the source of the values that one has (even if one doesn't practice the faith). Sometimes it is not.
Where I hesitate a little bit is because...people change as they get married and start raising a family. Values often have new meaning once a couple actually has a child in their arms and they start planning how they are going to teach what to their child. Some parents realize that they don't want to raise their children with no guidance their religion. Others get inspired at the chance to teach a child their religion in their own way.
If the parents cannot agree on a particular course...that leads to tension in the marriage, confusion for the child...and sometimes...worse. This problem is not restricted to interfaith marriages. Such a problem could even occur among Sikhs of different levels of orthodoxy, such as a marriage between a mona/i and a Keshdhari.
If the parents can agree on a particular course, and can do so without confusing the child...then I see no problem.
