Need Help With Drinking!

[Randip Singh]

My advice is that you must repalce an addication with something. You cannot leave an empty space as it is natural to want to fill it.

I've drunk too much in the past and I suggest replacing times you would have spent drinking with going out and doing something (any hobby).

I don't think it is a good idea going to AA, you are surronding yourself with people with worth problems than yourself and quite often peer groups can affect you.

My advice is replace your drinking with something and remember making good decisions is hard at first but it is like anything, it gets easier as you do it. The same is true for bad decisions.

Interestingly I attended my first open AA meeting yesterday to see what it was about, and you could not be further from the truth when you say "you are surronding yourself with people with worth problems than yourself ". I met unemployed people, buisnessmen, doctors, lawyers, some extremly succesful people, and one person with some other issues.

They seemed far more well adjusted than me, and a very strong sense of spirituality. I would have to disagree with your conclusion.

 

[Harry Haller]

Although AA could not help me, as it was an addictive nature I had a problem with, not alcohol per se, I have to agree with Randipji, it has a superb support network, and can be integrated with your belief as a sikh.

 

[spnadmin]

I am posting the 12 Steps of AA as a way to clarify its goals and objectives. Members can decide whether AA is only about drink, or about addiction. We can also decide whether the 12 steps can be integrated with Sikhism if we can actually see them in front of our eyes.

The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
Copyright © Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

The relative success of the A.A. program seems to be due to the fact that an alcoholic who no longer drinks has an exceptional faculty for "reaching" and helping an uncontrolled drinker.

In simplest form, the A.A. program operates when a recovered alcoholic passes along the story of his or her own problem drinking, describes the sobriety he or she has found in A.A., and invites the newcomer to join the informal Fellowship.

The heart of the suggested program of personal recovery is contained in Twelve Steps describing the experience of the earliest members of the Society:

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Newcomers are not asked to accept or follow these Twelve Steps in their entirety if they feel unwilling or unable to do so.

They will usually be asked to keep an open mind, to attend meetings at which recovered alcoholics describe their personal experiences in achieving sobriety, and to read A.A. literature describing and interpreting the A.A. program.

A.A. members will usually emphasize to newcomers that only problem drinkers themselves, individually, can determine whether or not they are in fact alcoholics.

At the same time, it will be pointed out that all available medical testimony indicates that alcoholism is a progressive illness, that it cannot be cured in the ordinary sense of the term, but that it can be arrested through total abstinence from alcohol in any form.

 

[Randip Singh]

Although AA could not help me, as it was an addictive nature I had a problem with, not alcohol per se, I have to agree with Randipji, it has a superb support network, and can be integrated with your belief as a sikh.

Interestingly Haller ji I was told the 12 step programme can be used forother addictions. It is there to help change the addictive personality.

The Oxford group which was the forunner for AA studied Eastern spiritualism and many of the ideas come from that.

Inparticular I like this idea:

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Sounds almost Nanakian in nature. A personal "God" , and we from from selfwilled to "God"willed! Manmukh to Gurmookh!

 

[Harry Haller]

Randipji,

You are absolutely correct, the 12 step program is identical for gambling and drug addiction, it did not work for me at the time for 2 reasons, firstly I had a huge ego, and secondly there were so many addictions I would have been at meetings every day!

In the end, over the course of the years, the addictions bored me, and they sorted themselves out. I am one of those people that would 'rather have a cup of tea' and I prefer that position to the fear of failure that can sometimes drive people to give up things, although for some, that is the only choice.

Of course, now I know that the addictive nature was merely a massive hole inside me that needed filling with the only thing big enough to fill it, which is of course the eternal truth, but I am comfortable with the path given to me, and thankful too, as with most relationships, those based on need, I feel, can run into problems

Thank you btw, for sharing with me your translation of the name of Ek Onkar, at the time, it inspired me, and continues to do so

 

[Randip Singh]

Randipji,

You are absolutely correct, the 12 step program is identical for gambling and drug addiction, it did not work for me at the time for 2 reasons, firstly I had a huge ego, and secondly there were so many addictions I would have been at meetings every day!

In the end, over the course of the years, the addictions bored me, and they sorted themselves out. I am one of those people that would 'rather have a cup of tea' and I prefer that position to the fear of failure that can sometimes drive people to give up things, although for some, that is the only choice.

Of course, now I know that the addictive nature was merely a massive hole inside me that needed filling with the only thing big enough to fill it, which is of course the eternal truth, but I am comfortable with the path given to me, and thankful too, as with most relationships, those based on need, I feel, can run into problems

Thank you btw, for sharing with me your translation of the name of Ek Onkar, at the time, it inspired me, and continues to do so

Brilliant.

That is exactly how it was described to me. With a lot of addictive personalities they are trying to fill a gap. Glad you found a solution.

Me personally I drank many years ago, and I just felt uncomfortable with not being in control of my faculties, hence stopped. I think I was more curious than anything else as we had always been given brandy for colds as children.