No One Out There

[RD1]

Loving your wife or partner unconditionally....
you want him/her to be happy and free!
So if your partner one day cheats on you....would you feel upset, betrayed...or feel happy for her..? she wanted something else....you accept your karam...you accept hers...and like free spirits you part company...

I have never been married. But I do agree with your definition of love. It is ideal. However, I think it is much more easier said than done.....cultivating such a mindset is challenging

 

[RD1]

Love =God? How is that for a starter for 10

Good start. So then if we are able to see the divine within ourselves, and in the other....then it is true love.

 

[sukhsingh]

Good start. So then if we are able to see the divine within ourselves, and in the other....then it is true love.

I'm not sure you necessarily have to be aware of the divine.. Unconditional love, selfless and altruistic is the purest expression of God?

 

[chazSingh]

I have never been married. But I do agree with your definition of love. It is ideal. However, I think it is much more easier said than done.....cultivating such a mindset is challenging

you're right...it's easier said than done...

it becomes easier the more you mingle with Waheguru...because once you start mingling...you're mingling with the only thing that really exists...the thing that exists within everyone and everything...and this then helps make love 'Free' lol without attachment...

Not to say that i'm free from it all...because the world does drag me back very often...and the same old habits and feelings and attachments start manifesting again...

But, if i make the effort to 'Mingle', then it becomes easier again

 

[Original]

I do not believe that we all have a "other half."

..we do, trust me ! The soul has to in this "life" find what it got separated from. And, that is what Sikh is all about. For if you don't, the cycle of 84 will continue and you'll be back again - on planet earth searching for your Ranjha or Heer, whatever the case.

I think this is something we desire

..okay, the operative word here is "desire"; desire must have a foundation and that foundation must be relied and "believed" in for it to manifest, yeah ? Because if you don't believe then it certainly wont manifest into a being, will it ? Take the theory of planet earth being flat. We now know it aren't flat, but those who believed it to be flat calculated the mapping n shaping of their gardens to the very T of perfection. Simply because they believed - try it !

I do not think we actually have a "other half," and I do not believe that Sikhi indicates that we do.

Sikh not only indicates but provides - go on sketch a list of your dream man !

Let's say your ideal man is intelligent, brave, handsome, generous, kind, chivalrous, faithful, recognising the equality of the sexes, morally n ethically upright, etc. You're not claiming ever to have seen such a man but have a desire based on your belief and this belief has the potential to manifest to your ideal, has it not ? simple yeah nay, pls ! Indeed, if you're from planet Venus, you'd want something like, slender, beefy, fair, dark, dreamy, practical character who is rugged and independent while following you around with a dog like devotion and attentive to your every wish. This ideal man can also be had, but only on planet Venus.

Your other half is here and it is this other half towards which love/hate will culminate into "one" true love - meaning, Waheguru !

 

[RD1]

I'm not sure you necessarily have to be aware of the divine.. Unconditional love, selfless and altruistic is the purest expression of God?

That is a good point....and perhaps practicing unconditional love, selflessness, altruism will allow us to feel connected to a greater force, a connecting force - the One. And we don't necessarily have to be aware of it initially.....
 

But, if i make the effort to 'Mingle', then it becomes easier again

What does 'mingling' with Waheguru look like to you/mean to you?

 

[RD1]

The soul has to in this "life" find what it got separated from. And, that is what Sikh is all about

And what we got separated from is Waheguru....and going back to Waheguru does not necessarily require a spouse/partner....

..okay, the operative word here is "desire"; desire must have a foundation and that foundation must be relied and "believed" in for it to manifest, yeah ? Because if you don't believe then it certainly wont manifest into a being, will it

That is a good point, focusing our belief and intention can perhaps influence what manifests in reality......I am a little skeptical about this though, and perhaps need to learn more about it.

 

[Harry]

..we do, trust me ! The soul has to in this "life" find what it got separated from. And, that is what Sikh is all about. For if you don't, the cycle of 84 will continue and you'll be back again - on planet earth searching for your Ranjha or Heer, whatever the case.

I would point out that there are several lines of thinking on this point, one of which is that there is only the one life to find a living heaven, and then you die.

 

[Harry]

..okay, the operative word here is "desire"; desire must have a foundation and that foundation must be relied and "believed" in for it to manifest, yeah ? Because if you don't believe then it certainly wont manifest into a being, will it ? Take the theory of planet earth being flat. We now know it aren't flat, but those who believed it to be flat calculated the mapping n shaping of their gardens to the very T of perfection. Simply because they believed - try it !

Desire could also be viewed as a very fickle emotion, people desire love, riches, respect, etc, I wonder if the opposite of such is grace?

Sikh not only indicates but provides - go on sketch a list of your dream man !

how can one possibly sketch a list of one's dream partner until one knows oneself?

 

[Original]

And what we got separated from is Waheguru

..could that Waheguru be our mother from whom we've separated at the beginning of time; you know the severing of the umbilical chord?

and going back to Waheguru does not necessarily require a spouse/partner....

...since the universe has infinite dimensions and infinity extends in all directions, there is no going back, forward, up, down, left, right, etc. If that'd be correct then what must follows is, ad sach jugad sach, ha b sach nanak hosi b sach, meaning, THIS IS IT, you'd always been here, find your other half ! And that other half aren't no dog or dolphin nor a dentist or a doctor, but another you. The same is reflected within the purview of SGGSJ, page 378.

Granted, it doesn't have to be a partner or a spouse, but it has to be an object of contemplation, which is compatible and capable of reciprocity of the wisdom Waheguru. Case in point is, it has to be via human. This human can be in any capacity, mother, father, brother, guru, friend, etc.

I would point out that there are several lines of thinking on this point, one of which is that there is only the one life to find a living heaven, and then you die.

..granted, there could be several lines of thinking, one in question I cite and advocate is Sikh. Consciousness survives the death of the body says SIKHISM, meaning, SIKH the believer does not "die".

Desire could also be viewed as a very fickle emotion, people desire love, riches, respect, etc, I wonder if the opposite of such is grace?

Hmmn, interesting observation H - 9 out of 10 this time around, keep it up ! But where grace is an endowment, desire a human constitution, drawing relative conclusions lacks necessary consistency.

how can one possibly sketch a list of one's dream partner until one knows oneself?

..again, good observation, but guess what ? RD1 has been there, done it n wearing the T-Shirt. She knows what she don't want, meaning she "knows" herself.

If you'd be the handsome coconut H then consider all pleasure mine and good to have touched base !

Love n Live

 

[Pathfinder]

She was completely alone in this world. There was no one at all for her. No one in the world who cared whether she lived or died. Sometimes the horror of that thought threatened to overwhelm her and plunge her down into a bottomless darkness from which there would be no return....

...If no one in the entire world cared about you, did you really exist at all?..

..I should have loved the imperfect you..Because I know now - There is no perfect partner and better half only means you just have to make half of you better for him and he will make the other half of you better for you - likewise the other way around.

Love is magical - tragically, magic is both good and bad. Just because one magic trick was bad we ought not to label the act thus and stage a walkout before the curtains fall.

Mortals go to far greater lengths....
....to avoid what they fear.....
....than to obtain what they desire...

 

[Sikhilove]

you're right...it's easier said than done...

it becomes easier the more you mingle with Waheguru...because once you start mingling...you're mingling with the only thing that really exists...the thing that exists within everyone and everything...and this then helps make love 'Free' lol without attachment...

Not to say that i'm free from it all...because the world does drag me back very often...and the same old habits and feelings and attachments start manifesting again...

But, if i make the effort to 'Mingle', then it becomes easier again

Everythings the God frequency, youve just got to believe that its all just Him.

 

[Original]

Everythings the God frequency, youve just got to believe that its all just Him.

...Her !..would you hold against me if I was to say it's all "Sikhilove" -

gdnite

 

[Dalvinder Singh Grewal]

Does anyone else ever feel repeatedly let down, and hopeless about finding the right partner for love and marriage?

No living being on this universe is perfect, hence no one gets a perfect partner. Everyone has to adjust to the other after their marriage alliance. The better you adjust, better the marriage relation is. For this understanding good and weak points of each other are to be known. Developing good points and covering up the weak points helps each other settle well. Assisting and aiding when needed discarding own comfort helps cementing the relationship.

 

[chazSingh]

No living being on this universe is perfect, hence no one gets a perfect partner. Everyone has to adjust to the other after their marriage alliance. The better you adjust, better the marriage relation is. For this understanding good and weak points of each other are to be known. Developing good points and covering up the weak points helps each other settle well. Assisting and aiding when needed discarding own comfort helps cementing the relationship.

i would go one step further...
covering up the weak points does no good...developing the weak points into positive points by way of self reflection, and talking about them openly is something i think is gooood

otherwise covering them up just means they are left there until one day they re-emerge!

 

[RD1]

Everythings the God frequency, youve just got to believe that its all just Him.

Love this.
How do you remind yourself of this when faced with adversity and maya?

 

[RD1]

i would go one step further...
covering up the weak points does no good...developing the weak points into positive points by way of self reflection, and talking about them openly is something i think is gooood

otherwise covering them up just means they are left there until one day they re-emerge!

This is so key. Through self-reflection and introspection, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves, and therefore can recognize things within that need further development. And I strongly believe that if we can reach such a level of intimacy within ourselves, it facilitates empathy, understanding, and compassion towards others.
 

Mortals go to far greater lengths....
....to avoid what they fear.....
....than to obtain what they desire...

Why is this?

 

[Pathfinder]

Why is this?

Fear of failure, hurt, rejection and so many Imaginery future scenarios that we build up. There is actually a term for it - philophobia I think, for fear of love. How weird, isn't it - tragic - how come love is something we fear.

Talk to (most of the pre-generation GPS/weather routing era) sea dogs and these mariners will tell you for a fact that the 'old man"(slang for captain) at sea would begin the day by smelling the storm well before the swell began to indicate the same. 7 times out of 10 they would be right. Ask them if any of the stony cold commanders could feel love - they would laugh so infectiously and so loud at your crazy query. The love breed does not exist at sea.

Likewise on land we smell imaginery fears and do not take a chance - because we need reasons to justify our cowardice.

She's perfect, but...I need time to be sure..I cannot find my dream partner.. what if?.. in case??...

Like Nanak stated - come to me in love with your head on a platter. Total surrender is alien to most of us mortals. No wonder we are unaware of the beauty of the truth, of love.

If I desire your love, I must discard and empty my heart of all fears and other thoughts. I must come empty to you and only then can you pour your love into my soul, my heart.

But an empty heart is akin to a empty ship at sea - scary in the slightest of storms. A loaded ship is more stable - so it's easy to fill our hearts and soul with the weight of doubt and fear. We feel more stable - sad, but true.

I knew she was going to hurt me one day. I knew it was not going to work out. Have we not heard these lines before?. Have we not felt these premonitions.

Fear is easy to run away from - than confront. The Nanak"s knew our frailty and gave us the Banee to toughen us up - so true desire for love would not be forsaken due our mortal fear.

We desire love, but tragically - love is what we fear most. I am a Sikh, but I am not a Khalsa. Why?? No points for guessing, lol - it is so obivious - is it not??. Fear love or love our fear - it's the same. To me the acceptance of Amrit is the first step in declaring - fear, you are so far that I cannot even smell you.

Lol, that was a long de-briefing.

 

[Sikhilove]

i would go one step further...
covering up the weak points does no good...developing the weak points into positive points by way of self reflection, and talking about them openly is something i think is gooood

otherwise covering them up just means they are left there until one day they re-emerge!

When you have a problem, it should be addressed via self reflection and contemplation for sure.

 

[Sikhilove]

Love this.
How do you remind yourself of this when faced with adversity and maya?

I see it as Babaji slandering me, beating me, making me stronger and encouraging me to Improve my reactions to emotions and to Maya. We always have the Choice to live in the balance- choose positivity and to be a positive person throughout the rubbish.​