The Cab Driver

[Harry Haller]

I got a cab home yesterday, Sian was working late, I was tired, cold, I got in to see one of those cheery cab drivers that you just do not want to see when you are cold and tired.

Hows life he said
****, I replied
Oh, he said, sorry about that
how about you? I said
Oh, my life is great, he went on to tell me about all his contentment, the long walks he enjoys with his wife, his dog, grandchildren, children, and the best thing, was at Christmas when all his family sat round the table, just the best thing in the world,

he went on and on, he really was the most contented man I had ever met, as we approached my house, and I paid him, I leaned back in and said
can I ask you a question?
sure, he replied
You have no sex drive do you?
he paused, thought, and then replied quietly,
no, that has never been important to me
I leaned out, smiled, and said, that is why you are so content.
he smiled back, rather have a walk and a cup of tea waved and drove off.

 

[Ishna]

A contented person will be content no matter what. It's not about what he has or doesn't have, whether he has a sex drive or not. He's just content. Likewise, a discontented person will be discontented no matter what, sex drive or no sex drive.

Contentment is inside, not outside. When I find it myself I'll let you know the way, but I can't guarantee the directions will be understandable. :-/

 

[Harry Haller]

It is becoming clear to me sis that there are certain people to whom becoming content is a lot easier than others, also, what it takes for one to become content varies depending on what you got given in your DNA, a paedophile is going to have a harder time becoming content than a married man with 2 kids who always wanted to be a married man with 2 kids..some of us can hear the howling, some cannot, I am not sure whether to envy them or pity them.

What I do know is that the howling is a side effect of searching, it is the howling that makes me who I am, the desire to search, understand, absorb, is all tied in with my ridiculous sex drive, which is why when I try and control myself, or reject parts of myself, switch things off, I end up having a knock on effect on my whole personality, SPNadminji was absolutely correct, we all have to be who we are, and understand our failings, rather than deny them.

 

[Sherdil]

In regards to the 5 thieves, kaam (lust) being one of them, gurbani says they are conquered as a side-effect of walking the spiritual path.

If you attempt to directly control them, you will not succeed. Gurbani uses the example of the renunciate many times. Even though they have renounced the pleasures of the world, the fire of desire still burns within them. Therefore, they still don't attain peace.

That is what you are describing. When you try to abstain, the desire within you keeps burning. That is why you are not content.

Your sex drive won't be satiated, no matter how much you indulge or how much you abstain. It will always be there.

It is best to not give it too much importance (like the cabbie said). When you try to deny lust, you are still thinking about it. Your entire focus turns to that subject, instead of God.

Gurbani says that the only way to quench this hunger and find contentment is to walk the spiritual path. The 5 thieves will be washed away on their own.