just sharing another facebook story --
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2013/1/9/nation/12550361&sec=nation
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2013/1/9/nation/12550361&sec=nation
Urgent! Need Help With Some Gender Equality Questions!
- Thread starter Harkiran Kaur
- Start date
- Replies 31
- Reads 6K
OMG This is why all who use social media MUST be cautious, exercise more self-control and skepticism than usual, and understand that when you are dealing with someone who is invisible/anonymous, then who you are and all your good qualities are nothing to them, because to them you are invisible too. Expendable! Easy to discard! Easy to use!
- Jul 20, 2012
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So I thought that removing him on Facebook was enough but apparently not. He saw my profile on a Sikh Matrimony site and decided to personally attack me (my notes are in blue). I wish to expose this guy now for what he is... so if any Sikh girls on here run into a guy who goes by 'Tejbir Singh' on Facebook and on SikhMatrimony.com, then stay far far away... because he would have you locked up in the house doing nothing but cooking cleaning and serving him.
Here is the personal attack he launched on me:
"as i told you before, for a woman to work is not the sikhi way and it is not conidered a correct thing for a woman to work in the environment where other men work, but i do not want to argue with you as your requirements are only those that should apply to you, for example you want someone in your profile that will cuddle up with you, (note: in my profile I put a small tagline about wanting someone who likes to cuddle - because I want someone who is not afraid to show affection, otherwise why be married at all? So he decided to attack me for that) how un sikhi. This is an issue between a married man and his wife. (which is what I thought I was emphasizing on my profile, since it IS a matrimonial site. That comment was more just a fun comment anyway)
You consider me a maulvi so be it, that is also your narrow minded thinking. You stay in a culture where you first have sex with a man before marraige for many years and then maybe get married, use dirty curse words and call them sweet and consider the law of the society to enjoy sex before marriage, then i am wrong in evrything i have said. (If he dislikes Western culture so much then why is he living here? And why would he put in his profile that he wants to live abroad since he has a green card?)
As far as sikh women who are accomplished in their lives, you can call them sikhs but we don't as these women do not have any traits of sikhism in them. (so he thinks any Sikh woman who has a career and is accomplished is NOT a Sikh??)
So as i said before that gurusikhs are protective of their daughters and not oppresive. You will not understand this as you have already done those things which we do not want our sisters and daughters to do and on top of that you have a huge attitude problem, which wite women do have. (my 'attitude' problem was backing up my answers with both Gurbani and the Rehet that women and men are equal and deserve equal opportunities. To which he could not rebut anyway... he never once used Gurbani to back anything up and says that his views are 'Sikh Culture' And this 'protectiveness' he was talking about was when he said that sikh boys would be allowed out to do things on their own, but a sikh girl would not. She too would have to stay at home locked up with the Mother. Forget education like University etc. Because he thinks Sikh women should not be educated or become successful! They should be entirely dependent on their husbands, making them impossible to be financially independent, which seals their fate even more, should the husband ever become abusive.)
You will find a sikh guy or any other guy who will be more than happy to cuddle with you, how desperate can you get. (personal attack again) This also you can say that sikhi allows you to discuss it openly.Your mail box will get get filled too, but then just wait after you get married, remember my words that it is going to be only a lot of cuddling only as you have mentioned it, so the main thing that will attract your profiles is that you are desperate for intimacy. (desperate no... or I would not have been single most of my adult life. Wanting someone to marry who is not a robot drone with no feelings and just going through the motions.... yes)
PLEASE do not mail me anymore (I thought I already did that?! HE contacted me!!!) as i have only more than wasted my energy on you who, of course being more educated than me and who not will not listen because you will put twisted meanings to words which are actually very good. (apparently women not being allowed to work and only being allowed to cook and clean and being locked in the house not talking to any men....is good!?)
So in the name of god don't contact me again as i do not want to pursue any coversation regarding sikhism or anything with you, as guru nanak dev ji has said "don't argue with a fool". You are in an illusion and will continue your whole life in illusion and so will your mate. Just by doing path, you don't gain anything, but it is fully understanding it and applying it your daily life that matters. (how this had anything to do with a woman having a career I do not know... or how having a career would hamper a woman's ability to apply Sikhi way of life is beyond me. But here you go... he thinks that women being locked away in the house IS applying Sikhi) "
Here is the personal attack he launched on me:
"as i told you before, for a woman to work is not the sikhi way and it is not conidered a correct thing for a woman to work in the environment where other men work, but i do not want to argue with you as your requirements are only those that should apply to you, for example you want someone in your profile that will cuddle up with you, (note: in my profile I put a small tagline about wanting someone who likes to cuddle - because I want someone who is not afraid to show affection, otherwise why be married at all? So he decided to attack me for that) how un sikhi. This is an issue between a married man and his wife. (which is what I thought I was emphasizing on my profile, since it IS a matrimonial site. That comment was more just a fun comment anyway)
You consider me a maulvi so be it, that is also your narrow minded thinking. You stay in a culture where you first have sex with a man before marraige for many years and then maybe get married, use dirty curse words and call them sweet and consider the law of the society to enjoy sex before marriage, then i am wrong in evrything i have said. (If he dislikes Western culture so much then why is he living here? And why would he put in his profile that he wants to live abroad since he has a green card?)
As far as sikh women who are accomplished in their lives, you can call them sikhs but we don't as these women do not have any traits of sikhism in them. (so he thinks any Sikh woman who has a career and is accomplished is NOT a Sikh??)
So as i said before that gurusikhs are protective of their daughters and not oppresive. You will not understand this as you have already done those things which we do not want our sisters and daughters to do and on top of that you have a huge attitude problem, which wite women do have. (my 'attitude' problem was backing up my answers with both Gurbani and the Rehet that women and men are equal and deserve equal opportunities. To which he could not rebut anyway... he never once used Gurbani to back anything up and says that his views are 'Sikh Culture' And this 'protectiveness' he was talking about was when he said that sikh boys would be allowed out to do things on their own, but a sikh girl would not. She too would have to stay at home locked up with the Mother. Forget education like University etc. Because he thinks Sikh women should not be educated or become successful! They should be entirely dependent on their husbands, making them impossible to be financially independent, which seals their fate even more, should the husband ever become abusive.)
You will find a sikh guy or any other guy who will be more than happy to cuddle with you, how desperate can you get. (personal attack again) This also you can say that sikhi allows you to discuss it openly.Your mail box will get get filled too, but then just wait after you get married, remember my words that it is going to be only a lot of cuddling only as you have mentioned it, so the main thing that will attract your profiles is that you are desperate for intimacy. (desperate no... or I would not have been single most of my adult life. Wanting someone to marry who is not a robot drone with no feelings and just going through the motions.... yes)
PLEASE do not mail me anymore (I thought I already did that?! HE contacted me!!!) as i have only more than wasted my energy on you who, of course being more educated than me and who not will not listen because you will put twisted meanings to words which are actually very good. (apparently women not being allowed to work and only being allowed to cook and clean and being locked in the house not talking to any men....is good!?)
So in the name of god don't contact me again as i do not want to pursue any coversation regarding sikhism or anything with you, as guru nanak dev ji has said "don't argue with a fool". You are in an illusion and will continue your whole life in illusion and so will your mate. Just by doing path, you don't gain anything, but it is fully understanding it and applying it your daily life that matters. (how this had anything to do with a woman having a career I do not know... or how having a career would hamper a woman's ability to apply Sikhi way of life is beyond me. But here you go... he thinks that women being locked away in the house IS applying Sikhi) "
Guru Nanak has also said 'Don't BE a fool!'
Well he left with a lot of bad blood! We are sorry you had such a bad experience. But at some point we all do!
Bibi Ji, Ty for PMming me in private.I have said all that needs said for now.You may share that with the group, if you like.But it will make sense if you did my two messages together.
kanwaljit Singh ji has said, we have said...ask yourself...is it worth it?You are wise.There is nothing to prove.Like I said to me it looks there is nothing sikhi about this persons thoughts.He is simply a control freak cyber bully and out to groom anyone that falls for his rubbish...he is misusng Gurbani... in his ways for what purposes I dont know obviously all this is hidden from his facebook profile...My advise ..ignore and watch in future he may use another profile to get at you ...as I see he is already found a way to get to you.
kanwaljit Singh ji has said, we have said...ask yourself...is it worth it?You are wise.There is nothing to prove.Like I said to me it looks there is nothing sikhi about this persons thoughts.He is simply a control freak cyber bully and out to groom anyone that falls for his rubbish...he is misusng Gurbani... in his ways for what purposes I dont know obviously all this is hidden from his facebook profile...My advise ..ignore and watch in future he may use another profile to get at you ...as I see he is already found a way to get to you.
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I apologize to be intruding. But is he the same guy you were planning to meet a month ago?
it is interesting how he is trying make YOU feel guilty...in the last two paragraphs...
- Jul 20, 2012
- 1,393
- 1,921
No... I met that guy and he is now a good friend! Though he is in the UK. But we still talk a lot and email etc. That guy I met, was extremely nice and down to earth! He went to the Gurdwara here with me, and everyone here like him! And that was in the Summer... not a month ago
time flies! This guy added me on Facebook when he saw something I posted on the FB wall of a Sikh group on there. From day 1 he has been trying to make me feel like I don't know anything about Sikhi, and that he is more knowledgable than anyone even so far as to say that my Sangat are all wrong! Though I agree he is a walking contradiction because this self proclaimed all mighty all knowing Sikh trims his beard! I have now blocked him in addition to having him off my list.
Oh that is great! Yes you meet troubling people in life. It's great you can block most, on FB
BlazinSikh
SPNer
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh!
I wonder with the attitude that this man towards with women, will have ever find happiness. Miss Akasha Ji you honestly got nothing to worry about this "man", just keep your mind on Akal Purakh Waheguru Ji, and your true love will come knocking at your door.
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh!
I wonder with the attitude that this man towards with women, will have ever find happiness. Miss Akasha Ji you honestly got nothing to worry about this "man", just keep your mind on Akal Purakh Waheguru Ji, and your true love will come knocking at your door.
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh!
- Jul 20, 2012
- 1,393
- 1,921
I am not worried about him myself anymore as said I blocked him completely so he can't even see my profile anymore. But I am worried if he might try this with someone else. And if she might fall for his shenanigans, end up being led into something bad.
BlazinSikh
SPNer
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh!
All we can do is leave this in the hands of Waheguru Ji. That to me is the greatest punishment any human being can recieve. Punishments from us mortal will have no use over this lost soul.
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh!
All we can do is leave this in the hands of Waheguru Ji. That to me is the greatest punishment any human being can recieve. Punishments from us mortal will have no use over this lost soul.
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh!
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