1984 Anti-Sikh Pogrom What Does It Mean To Forgive?

[Taranjeet singh]

I lost my father due to 1984 riots and a sequel to this had to live with my mother who had gone almost insane and vegetated and pulped out till 2008 when He called her back. I had no childhood and have no memories of the same. I was too young to understand when it all happened and I had to cut my 'Juda' or was cut by others to save me. Same was the fate of my two other younger brothers.

I remained busy with my studies and was not permitted to see my mother till 2000. It was same for my younger brothers. I spent my younger days in orphanage called as 'hostels'.
Time changed and I grew up and rationalized and found that it was always good for me to forgive and forget everything. I am at peace with myself. Forgiving and forgetting has done a great good to me. There was no alternative. But I learnt a lot .
'Government' is an amorphous term. It means nothing.It is collective psyche of men at helm, in power, who mould decisions and make them.
I still do not know whom I have forgiven ;whether I have forgiven myself of forgiving them late or have I forgiven who were responsible for the tragedy.
I do not call my parents sacrificed their lives for the cause of sikhi, they were murdered coldly out of mob mentality and that is the end of 1984 for me. I have no picture or photographs of my parents with me and I have forgotten them. It was all destined and was His Hukum in Broader perspective.


“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
― Kent M. Keith

 

[Luckysingh]

Some very good posts.

Forgiveness is similar to a quality that we have to work at. It helps in line with humility and helps us in being more humble and accepting.

To not forgive, leaves one feeling that they are carrying weight and burden.
After forgiving, the forgiver has some feeling of relief as well as the forgiven.

I say that it is a quality, at times that I wish I had more of, so that I could forgive a lot easier.

 

[Mai Harinder Kaur]

I lost my father due to 1984 riots and a sequel to this had to live with my mother who had gone almost insane and vegetated and pulped out till 2008 when He called her back...

Your comment brought tears to my eyes. I was also quite probably insane for some years following 1984. I guess it was Hukam of Waheguru that I recover my wits, possibly so I could relate what happened to others.

Can you now face your past without pain or resentment? Have you become reconciled to your very great losses? Is this what it means to forgive?

I specifically hold certain members of the Congress (I) Party responsible, along with the individuals who actually performed the violent acts. I do not believe in collective guilt, so can only accuse specific people.

My love to you.

 

[Taranjeet singh]

Can you now face your past without pain or resentment? Have you become reconciled to your very great losses? Is this what it means to forgive?

I specifically hold certain members of the Congress (I) Party responsible, along with the individuals who actually performed the violent acts. I do not believe in collective guilt, so can only accuse specific people.

My love to you.

Very many thanks for your kind comments, I need them sometimes.

It is not for me to reflect on the past that I avoid. I am married now and may be a father in short time. Life keeps on flowing and takes it turns. Retrospection of something that I did not understand is meaningless.It is the way I perceive things.

Forgiving ,for me, is not to have ill -will or ill feeling for those who intend to harm me physically or otherwise. It is for them to know what they are doing. But Like others, I do have an instinct of self defense and survival. I am now capable to take care of myself and am quite stubborn/adamant and have little compassion. My luck or ill luck!. Sikhs,in any way, do not believe in Luck or ill-luck.

I also feel that certain big wigs of the then ruling party were responsible for this massacre. Few have died and few wait their turns.Life continues as it has always done. We also continue to flow along that Harry ji nicely puts as what he calls ,sometimes' 'consonance'.

SPN is great place to learn new things.It is good to be here. I shall stop as I am in office.

Sincerely wishing you warm and peaceful days ahead.

 

[findingmyway]

Some very good posts.

Forgiveness is similar to a quality that we have to work at. It helps in line with humility and helps us in being more humble and accepting.

To not forgive, leaves one feeling that they are carrying weight and burden.
After forgiving, the forgiver has some feeling of relief as well as the forgiven.

I say that it is a quality, at times that I wish I had more of, so that I could forgive a lot easier.

The million dollar question is how............

 

[Luckysingh]

The million dollar question is how............

In a similar way that you don't forgive or refuse to forgive and carry the burden, is the way to make the other choice, to forgive.

 

[Kanwaljit.Singh]

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
― Kent M. Keith<!-- google_ad_section_end -->

Like Taranjeet veerji highlighted above.

 

[sid]

gurufateh
to forgive is best solution but this forgiveness needs involvement of every indian by proper mechanism every one should have this answer why and how and to whom this forgiveness is given because now new generation of india knows very well that how indian government(full of corruption and poltician with zero moral value) misused their power and still they are misusing in different area and in different situation but for same purpose that is to mute voice of every one by applying policies like killing weak,divide and rule at every step,etc.
again i am mentioning that to forgive is only solution but involvement of every indian is very must by proper mechanism.
it is very right that root of brotherhood in india is very strong but by proper mechanism of forgiveness it can be made more strong.which is fruitful for everyone.
after all indians are living in this subcontinent for moreover than thousands year.we share same history.same ancestor.same culture,little differences are their but still unity is 1000 time fruitful and strong than differences