Findingmyway ji
Some clarifications and some comments.
This thread was started by Sikh youth to understand the SIKHI viewpoint. To keep bringing in concepts which do not have anything to do with Sikh philosophy, e.g. the reclusive lifestyle of Buddhist monks is misleading and confusing for youngsters reading this.
The likeliness of this being cause for confusion is very little as compared to what goes on generally here, namely, Sikhs disagreeing with each other while both sides making reference to and quoting the same authoritative source.
The reference to Buddhist monks is not a matter of bringing in another viewpoint hence possibly distracting, but an illustration for the purpose of better understanding the issue, all within context of what the Truth is.
I ask all members to be responsible and stick to SIKH philosophy on this thread. To explore other concepts of hair, please start a new thread in the interfaith forum section.
My intention has always been to share what I understand with others so that they too will gain something. But due either or both to my own and other people's attachments, disturbances can't be avoided. But I don’t think that this is enough reason to stop writing.
From where I stand there is either a correct or incorrect understanding with regard to the concept of hair. Therefore I do not have the perception of coming in with a Buddhist perspective against a Sikh perspective. So no need to start a new thread in the interfaith forum I would think, but that either we continue here or not at all.
Now on to the other points.
Being a householder and a Sikh is not about leading a simple life by eliminating all distractions and tests in life.
A person who decides to become a recluse is motivated not by removal of distractions, but rather the risk of being distracted and this getting worse.
Being a Sikh is about living a simple life and functioning in the normal world despite what is happening around you.Being a recluse is completely against Sikh philosophy as you are no longer able to cope with life challenges if you are just removing them from around you.
The decision to become a recluse comes from seeing aspects of experiences a layperson fails to see or if he does, knows himself not to be ready for. This is that attachment is unwholesome and lead to much harm, and how this arises from the moment one opens one’s eyes in the morning up till the time that one goes to sleep. Such a person knows also that he can do without objects of attachment which come in the form of material possessions, family and friends. Moreover he knows that to live as a layperson, this is impossible without some degree of attachment and conceit being involved.
More importantly, he understands that living together with other people, particularly those with low character, given his own still existent unwholesome tendencies, the chance of being corrupted is high, therefore it is better that he find wiser and better people to associate with, and if this is not possible, live alone.
Is this a process of removing things around you or is it moving toward what is more beneficial? Beneficial not only for oneself, but for other people as well. After all what good can come from a situation where all involved end up increasing their unwholesome tendencies? Indeed, that one decides to give up objects of attachment may act as inspiration for those who remain, to also develop detachment to the extent that is possible for them. And also when the one goes to visit the other, instead of talking about lowly matters, there can be talk related to morality and wisdom instead.
So indeed, one person in one family decides to become a recluse (with the right motivation), this will possibly bring much benefit to the whole family.
The real challenge is not being influenced by what is around you.
The real challenge is to understand the experience through the five senses and the mind. If this does not happen, then invariably one will be fooled into thinking that one needs to rise above the influence of other people. And essentially this is no different in fact, from being influenced by them.
Gurbani describes a beautiful lotus flower not being influenced by its surroundings.
One must *be* a lotus flower to begin with, and not just imagine that one is so. Such lotus flower will however also know that it is a waste of time to associate with fools and that it is better to live and talk with people who have the potential to develop the good.
Keeping kesh and turban is nothing to do with attachment
If you ever noticed how turning the direction of one's gaze away from one object and toward another is by force correspondingly, of aversion and attachment. If you knew that thoughts related to the past and future including such simple ones as, “what to do?” are motivated by attachment. If you knew that to look into the mirror and decide to comb your hair must beside attachment also involve conceit. If you had some understanding as to what is involved in holding a belief. You will see that the idea of keeping kesh and turban must encourage not only much attachment and conceit, but also wrong understanding.
but do so with not being afraid to be who you are.
“Not being afraid to be who you are” must include the decision to do what one pleases with regard to one’s own hair. In your case apparently, this comes only after a decision to hold the particular belief (of keeping hair). It therefore works not as sign of being independent in mind, but as dependence on an ideal. And this can only encourage more conceit.
Guru Gobind Singh ji brought in our identity so people couldn't run away from doing the right thing. We should be visible from a distance so people in trouble can identify Sikhs and know they can come to them for help.
If you only knew about a local Thai belief with regard to perceiving a Sikh coming their way, (very unflattering) I believe that you would hesitate from saying what you said here. And perhaps you will also see the wrongness of reliance on symbols, which according to me can only have a corrupting effect.
This is nothing to do with attachment, but is everything to do with being able and willing to do the right thing and not being ashamed to be identified by those in need. This attitude is not conceited on any level.
This is what you superimpose onto reality, which is each individual's moment to moment experience. It can only lead in the case of those who are attached, to grow even more so and also act as a boost to their sense of self importance.